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Spaghettimonsteret eller Jehova?

Frokosten ble avbrutt av et skarpt dunk i dørkarmen en tidlig morgen da husets tenåring gjorde entré på kjøkkenet. Lyden stammet fra dørslaget han hadde tredd nedover hodet. Jeg måtte åpenbart ha gjort store øyne, for han flirte litt og rettet kjekt på den uvanlige hodepryden.

– Slapp av, kjære opphav! Jeg bare tester ut en religion. The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.  Det er helt uforpliktende. Èn måneds prøveperiode. Alle kostnader refunderes dersom jeg ikke liker det.

-Øh, hva er det egentlig dere tror på, da?

-Jo, først og fremst det flygende spahettimonsteret. Han trakk frem mobilen og viste meg en spaghettifloke med kjøttboller, og øyne. -Ja, og så at global oppvarming skyldes nedgangen i antallet pirater i verden.

Jeg registrerte at han bet seg i leppen for ikke å begynne å le.

-Ok, bare jeg får igjen dørslaget når prøveperioden er over.

Han snappet med seg matpakke og gymtøy, og strøk på dør. Denne gangen med god klaring fra dørkarmen.

Jeg ble sittende igjen og tenke. Jehovas Vitne ble nylig nektet statstilskudd. Årsaken var eksklusjonspraksisen deres. I følge gruppens egne tekster skal konsekvensene ved å forlate menigheten være at vedkommende ikke lenger får ha kontakt med familie og venner der. Dette gjelder også mindreårige. Organisasjonen Hjelpekilden tar i mot mennesker som mister hele sitt nettverk når de ikke lengre kan eller får lov til å være en del av trossamfunnet. Historiene derfra er mange og sterke. I fjor kunne norske media fortelle om en tobarnsmor som gikk til det skritt å saksøke Jehovas Vitne fordi hun mente seg rettstridig ekskludert.

Kostnadene ved en slik utestengelse kan vanskelig måles i penger. I dommen fra lagmannsretten beskrives det hvordan hun plutselig mistet all kontakt med famile, venner og bekjente innenfor menigheten. Ingen av medlemmene fikk lov til å ha kontakt med henne lengre. Dette innbefattet både hennes egen mor og de to sønnene hennes. Hun vant frem i lagmannsretten, og ble tilkjent 100.000,- i erstatning for ikke-økonomisk tap, såkalt oppreisning. Kanskje dommen innebar et element av moralsk seier for henne? Det unner jeg henne. Samtidig er jeg redd at hverken penger eller seier i en norsk rettssal noensinne kan veie opp for det knusende tapet hun led i Rikets sal. Slike kostnader er ikke-refunderbare.

Ved middagstider var alle kjøkkenredskapene på plass igjen, og tenåringen atter barhodet.

-Hva skjedde? Mistet troen allerede? Noen som kom med stygge kommentarer?

-Nei, nei! Alle var greie. Både lærerne og elevene. Men. Vi hadde gruppearbeid store deler av dagen. Skaftet på dørslaget dultet hele tiden borti dem som satt ved siden av meg. Det var likevel ikke det verste. Det verste var gymmen. Har du noensinne prøvd å nikke en ball med dørslag på hodet?En lærepenge i gymmen er heller ikke refunderbar, men den kostnaden syntes han å takle fint.

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